Embracing life’s journey through love, sacrifice and God’s Grace

Years ago, while working together on an Easter story for a monthly newsletter, Bishop Edward T. Hughes looked at a photo of three crosses standing on a distant hill, black silhouettes against a burnt orange sky, and said, almost imperceptibly, “That’s the greatest love story ever told.”

The restrained emotion in his voice became part of a memory that has kept me mindful for some 30 years that love is a tapestry woven with sacrifice and purpose, gratitude and God’s Grace.

Sometimes, if we are paying attention, we get to see that love story played out in the lives of family, friends or colleagues.

I met Art Cichy during my early years in the Diocese of Metuchen. It wasn’t long before I met his wife, Georgianne. They were always together: Art pushing Georgianne’s wheelchair through the diocesan center, attending Mass, in the supermarket or at a parish event. It was memorable to witness because they were always smiling. And there was something special about Georgianne’s smile.

“It was the first gift she gave to me. A smile,” said Art, who shared a quote by Mother Teresa that graced the wall of their home: “We will never know how much just a simple smile will do.”

When Art recalls his life with Georgianne, who lived with Friedreich’s Ataxia – a rare, inherited, progressive disease affecting the nerves and muscles – he often begins at the end, days before she passed away June 25, 2019.

“Georgianne had just received her new wheelchair … with new features that would make things more comfortable for her,” he said. The couple went for lunch, which is when Georgianne told Art she wasn’t feeling well. Within hours, they were in the JFK Medical Center emergency room.

“She was immediately sent to the ICU. She could still talk, and she told me that her body was failing her,” Art said. “She started talking about her funeral and that she wanted the coffin closed and a Rosary made of pink and red flowers.”

Georgianne had suffered a massive heart attack and was sent to CICU in Hackensack Medical Center. There, she suffered a stroke. “I stayed with her till the morning,” Art said. When he returned in the afternoon, she was on a ventilator and medications, a state she would remain in for the next five days.

“I was glad to see Georgianne with a peaceful look on her face,” said Art, sharing that “she loved God, believed in God and knew the better thing was coming. She couldn’t get it here, but she wanted to get to the next place to have it.”

After talking with her doctors, the decision was made to take her off life support. “I stayed with her till the end and kissed her goodbye. I texted some people that Georgianne is now with God,” Art recalled.

The couple had been married for 42 years, having started dating just months before Georgianne’s 21st birthday.

Georgianne, who had undergone a 12-hour surgery for scoliosis at age 13, had begun seeing a neurologist while they were still dating. “I went along with her,” said Art, who was there when the neurologist confirmed Friedreich’s Ataxia and spoke with the couple about the road ahead, which would be difficult.

“I didn’t consider it a burden. I was in love with her,” said Art, who felt he was a very selfish person when he first met Georgianne in the 1970s. “I needed a purpose in my life, and she became my purpose. She made life so much easier. Helping her made me happy.”

And Art had plenty of opportunities to do so.

Georgianna spent 36 of their 39 years of marriage in a wheelchair. For the last 20 years of her life, she wore braces on both legs, and hand braces for the last 10 years several times a week. She went to speech therapy because the vocal cord on the right side of her throat was mostly paralyzed. Her vision deteriorated over time, tiredness increased, as she dealt with an enlarged heart, diabetes and muscle spasms.

“Most people looked at me and Georgianne and would say that I was her caregiver. They would not see that, in reality, we were each other’s caregiver,” said Art. “Georgianne worked extremely hard to make sure I stayed healthy. She did a damn good job of it. I am forever grateful for her care of me. I was blessed to have her for my wife.”

Throughout the hard times, there were exceptional moments of love, gratitude, God’s grace and faith.

In 1995, Georgianne was initiated into the Catholic Church. “My faith came from her. She became Catholic, and I became a better Catholic,” said Art.

On May 20 of that year, the couple renewed their vows in a Catholic church, and continued attending Mass every week until the end. They saw Pope St. John Paul II at Giants Stadium and Pope Benedict XVI at Yankee Stadium in the same place Art’s father saw Pope Paul VI celebrate Mass.

Every time the couple traveled, they went to Mass. “I don’t know how many different churches we went to, but Georgianne loved it,” said Art.

Georgianne summarized her approach to life in a Facebook message to an old schoolmate, saying, “I have a rare neuromuscular disease, and I’ve been in a wheelchair since 1984. But I have a very happy life thanks to my husband, Art, and a positive take on things.”

During a disability seminar at the Diocese, Art and Georgianne participated in the Stations of the Cross. Georgianne read the Second Station: Jesus takes up his Cross.

“Jesus showed us miraculous strength, both physical and spiritual. He was given a cross to bear, and this was the very beginning of his journey,” she said. “Every step will get harder: As my disease progresses, the physical and emotional frustrations with my disabilities become intense and at times unbearable. By identifying with this Station, I can regain the strength to grow and endure with grace. Jesus told us in Luke 14:27, ‘Whoever does not bear his own cross cannot be my disciple.’”

Art read the Fifth Station – Simon helps Jesus carry his Cross – sharing, “Like Simon, I don’t know why I was chosen, but I am eager to give strength and assistance to my wife’s life. Being a spouse and caretaker has been a rewarding experience with unexpected detours through our lifetime journey. We are traveling together, and our lives have endured some pretty heavy burdens, but like the Stations of the Cross, the end makes it all worth it. Jesus, thank you for this glimpse