For vicar general, the priesthood has been about patience

Father Jay Toborowsky, VG
Celebrating 25 years

How did a nice Jewish boy from Perth Amboy grow up to celebrate a quarter-century of Catholic priesthood? To hear the Very Rev. Father Jonathan S. Toborowsky, who serves as Vicar General and Moderator of the Curia for the Diocese of Metuchen, explain it, “Looking back now, I see it as a gradual process.”

Born to Patricia, a Catholic, and Lawrence Toborowsky, young Jonathan was educated in his father’s faith of Judaism. He attended Perth Amboy’s Hillel Academy Hebrew Day School through the fifth grade, celebrating his Bar Mitzvah at age 13. He credited his maternal grandmother’s Catholic faith as the impetus for his new spiritual direction.

“After my parents divorced, my mother and I moved in with her,” he explained. “When she went to Sunday Mass, she brought me along. That was my first exposure to Mass and the Church.”

The Boy Scout troop chartered by St. Anthony of Padua Parish, Port Reading “brought me into contact with Catholic kids and the occasional Communion Breakfast,” he recalled, “and my best friends were altar servers, so I learned the ‘behind the scenes’ things in church life. The first real ‘thoughts’ were just about becoming Catholic and not about priesthood when I was not long out of [Woodbridge] High School.”

While working in local government as an aide to the mayor of Woodbridge Township and attending Middlesex County College, Edison, he received instruction in the Catholic faith and was baptized in September of 1990. Supporting his continued steps to a new faith tradition, Father Toborowsky said, were the efforts of St. Anthony’s new pastor, Father Robert Lynam (now pastor of St. Augustine of Canterbury Parish, Kendall Park.)

“He had a zeal for getting people involved in parish life,” said Father Toborowsky, who subsequently served as a Lector, an Extraordinary Minister of Holy Communion, part of a collection counting team, helped to decorate the church and other duties. “All of these things over the years guided me to ask, ‘What is God asking of me?’”

The future priest was confirmed in June, 1991, and accepted as a seminarian in 1992, enrolling in Seton Hall University, South Orange, where he earned a Bachelor of Arts Degree and graduated cum laude. He earned a Master of Divinity Degree and a Master of Arts Degree in theology and Church History from Mount St. Mary’s Seminary, Emmitsburg, Md., in 1998.

Father Toborowsky was ordained to the priesthood May 30, 1998, by Bishop Vincent de Paul Breen. His parish assignments include terms as parochial vicar at St. James, Basking Ridge; St. Mary, Alpha, and St. Thomas the Apostle, Old Bridge, before being named administrator, then pastor, of St. Lawrence Parish, Laurence Harbor, and pastor of Immaculate Conception Parish, Annandale.

Father Toborowsky has served in diverse roles in service to the Diocese of Metuchen, including as Dean of the Raritan Bay Deanery; member of the Presbyteral Council; member of the College of Consultors; associate director, Diocesan Office of Vocations; moderator of Proclaim the Good News, the diocesan radio show, and member of the Commission for Historical Records.

Despite these   weighty responsibilities, he noted his favorite duties as a priest are “visiting the homebound and bringing them Holy Communion; visiting the sick in hospitals and hearing Confessions,” he enumerated, “the ‘priestly’ things that I was ordained to do, rather than the administrative tasks that I must do.”

Among the greatest challenges Father Toborowsky has encountered as a priest were in supporting his congregations during disasters: St. James, Basking Ridge, during the aftermath of 9/11; St. Lawrence, Laurence Harbor, for Superstorm Sandy, and Immaculate Conception, Annandale, during the COVID lockdown.

The priest’s advice to someone considering a life as a priest reflects his own methodical journey. “I never jumped into becoming a priest,” said Father Toborowsky. “First, I thought about becoming a Catholic, then I thought about being involved in parish life. Only after a few years did the thought that ‘maybe God is calling me to the priesthood’ take shape. Be patient and be open to the next step in God’s plan for you.”

On June 16, family, friends and fellow clergy united in St. John Vianney Parish, Colonia, for a celebratory Mass marking Father Toborowsky’s 25 years. The liturgy’s homilist, Msgr. Robert Fuhrman of Livingston, had been rector of St. Andrew’s College Seminary during Father Toborowsky’s time as a student, and had preached the new priest’s first Mass in 1998.

“You have proven your qualities by using your gifts,” said Msgr. Fuhrman. “You represent the Lord well in your assignments.” The congregation chuckled as he revealed his calculation that Father Toborowsky’s 25 years of priesthood spanned 9,148 days. Msgr. Fuhrman concluded, “Onward to the next 9,000 days… and more.”