Living a chaste life means loving in pure, holy ways

For better, for worse, or richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health… until death.” This vow has been declared tens of millions of times over the centuries as a pledge of love between a man and a woman embarking upon their new life as “two becoming one flesh (see Gensis 2:2 and Matthew 19: 5-6). Saint Paul explains further that Christan couples have “put on Christ” (Galatians 3:27 ) who is the model of all chastity. As such, whether married or unmarried, “all th baptized are called to chastity” (cc 2348 ). In fact, “at the moment of his baptism the Christian is pledged to lead an affective life in chastity” (cc 2348 ).

The Church teaches that the only legitimate circumstance for human beings to engage in sexual relations is within the context of a monogamous marriage between one man and one woman. For Catholics, this means enjoying the freedom to receive the Holy Sacrament of Matrimony whereby a man and a woman are willing and able to give of themselves, in the presence of God, exclusively to one another. Therefore, "the deliberate use of the sexual faculty...outside of marriage is essentially contrary to its purpose" (ccc 2352). Why? Because the dignity of who we are as the best of God's creation, as well as the dignity of human sexuality, "is naturally ordered to the good of spouses and the generation and education of children" (ccc 2353).

The Catechism counsels: "People should cultivate [chastity] in the way that is suited to their state of life" (ccc 2349). For example, those who choose the vocation of marriage "are called to live conjugal chastity; others practice chastity in continence" (ccc 2349). Any kind of sexual pleasure outside of marriage "is morally disordered (since it is)...sought for itself, isolated from its procreative and unitive purposes" (ccc 2351).

The next 5 paragraphs deal with the love of husband and wife (ccc 2360-2365). The way that a "man and woman give themselves to one another through the acts which are proper and exclusive to spouses, is not something simply biological, but concerns the innermost being of the human person as such" (ccc 2361). "The spouses' union achieves the twofold end of marriage: the good of the spouses themselves and the transmission of life" (ccc 2363).

Regarding conjugal fidelity, a husband and a wife are called to "give themselves definitively and totally to one another" (ccc 2363). As Jesus says, "They are no longer two; from now on they form one flesh...What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder" (Mark 10:8-9). Early Church Father, Saint John Chrysostom, quoted in the Catechism, teaches "that young husbands should say to their wives: I have taken you in my arms, and I love you, and I prefer you to my life itself" (ccc2365).

The next section (ccc 2366-2372) explains the "fecundity" of marriage a "a gift, an end of marriage, for conjugal love naturally tends to be fruitful...spring[ing] from the very heart of that mutual giving, as its fruit and fulfillment" (ccc2366). Called to give life, spouses share in the creative power and fatherhood of God. "Married couples should regard it as their proper mission to transmit human life and to educate their children; they should realize that they are thereby cooperating with the love of God the Creator" (ccc2367).

"For just reasons, spouses may wish to space the births of their children. It is their duty to make certain that their desire is not motivated by selfishm

 

Quoting from Pope Pau VI’s 1968 encyclical Humani Vitae, the Church reminds us that “Periodic continence, that is, the methods of birth regulation based on self-observation and the use of infertile periods is in conformity with the objective criteria of morality…In contrast, ‘every action which, whether in anticipation of the conjugal act, …its accomplishment, or…the development of its natural consequences, proposes, whether as an end or as a means to render procreation impossible’ is intrinsically evil” (cc 2370)

On the positive side, the opening words of Sacred Scripture capture the sentiment that procreation of human beings is considered good: "Be fruitful and multiply" (Genesis 1:28). Later, Psalm 127 uses the analogy of arrows and quivers to communicate the same sentiment: "Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one's youth. Blessed is the man who has his quiver full of them" (Psalm 127:3-5).

The Catechism comments: "Sacred Scripture and the Church's traditional practice see in large families a sign of God's blessing and the parents' generosity" (ccc 2373).

Sadly, there are circumstances when "couples...discover that they are sterile [and as a result] suffer greatly" (ccc 2374). The Catechism advises that legitimate "research aimed at reducing human sterility is to be encouraged" (ccc 2375), though "techniques that entail the dissociation of husband and wife, by the intrusion of a person other than the couple (donation of sperm, ovum, surrogate uterus), [however], are gravely immoral" (ccc 2376).

Additionally, "techniques involving only the married couple (homologous artifical insemination and fertilization) are perhaps less reprehensible, yet remain morally unacceptable" (ccc 2377). Why? Because "a child is not something owed to one, but is a gift...A child may not be considered a piece of property" (ccc 2378).

Christian couples challenged by the inability to have children are called to embrace the cross of Jesus Christ. The Catechism explains: "Spouses who still suffer from infertility after exhausting legitimate medical procedures should unite themselves with the Lord's Cross..." (ccc 2379). Many such couples have also found solace in adopting children who have no parents. Others have given their time and energy to important apostolates within the Church. As the Catechism teaches: "They can give expression to their generosity by adopting abandoned children or performing demanding services for others" (ccc 2379).

My friends, living a chaste life means loving in pure and holy ways; respecting ourselves and others as being made in the image and likeness of God. Just as we seek true happiness for ourselves, we should desire the same for others because we are children of the same God. And, taking the time to use the beest of God's gifts, including the gift of chastity, is a life worth living.

Father Hillier is Director, diocesan Office of Pontifical Mission Societies, the Office for Persons with Disabilities and Censo Luborum.